Match report: CMP FC 13-1 Tim's Boys
The game: CMP FC and Tim’s Boys treated fans to a live re-enactment of the recent election on Sunday morning, with CMP taking the role of Labour while Tim’s Boys emulated National, and both played their parts to perfection.
By the first half’s finish CMP already had a 9-1 lead and while the onslaught lost some steam in the second, hat tricks to Thomas Kirkland and Jetski Bennet sealed the deal.
The goals:
Jetski Bennet (CMP, 7th minute) A curling cross from James Wilson reached Bennet who fired the ball past an outstretching keeper.
Max Petersen (CMP, 12th minute) From some distance Max Petersen's shot flew through the air and sailed into the net.
Nicholas Masters (Tim’s Boys, 13th minute) Played in from the right, Masters cut inside, breached the defence, and sent a decisive thump into the goal.
Tom Kirkland (CMP, 16th minute) Kirkland nabbed his first of many, with some brilliant play between CMP attackers leaving the defence and goalie unable to stop his shot.
Jetski Bennet (CMP, 22nd minute) CMP struck down the right wing, and their cross would do all the hard work with Bennet only needing a tap in for his second.
Max Petersen (CMP, 24th minute) Petersen was played through for a 1 v 1, and arrived to the ball first for a shot which would crash into the net’s roof.
Tom Kirkland (CMP, 27th minute) CMP played their way into the area and proceeded to punish Tim’s Boys for giving them the time and space to cause serious damage.
Tom Schuyt (CMP, 32nd minute) Once Schuyt had nicked the ball off an unsuspecting defender, his goal was a foregone conclusion.
Jetski Bennet (CMP. 37th minute) After CMP had sufficiently dismantled Tim’s defence, a tap in was what made Bennet’s hat trick.
Tom Kirkland (CMP, 60th minute) Kirkland’s hat trick on the other hand would arrive in style; collecting the ball from some 35 yards out, the striker’s shot would soar into the top corner.
Merlin (CMP, 77th minute) As they did so often, CMP were in the box with a goal looking certain. Yet Tim’s keeper Shannon Lucas performed admirably to save the first three shots, but everyone has their limit. Despite all of Lucas’ hard work it was fourth time lucky as Merlin poked it past him.
Tom Kirkland (CMP, 79th minute) In the box Kirkland was given all the time in the world, so naturally his strike into the bottom corner was nigh unstoppable.
Isaac Bell (CMP, 85th minute) CMP were awarded a penalty, and Bell duly converted, slotting the ball past Lucas.
Isaac Bell (CMP, 88th minute) Bell’s initial attempt was stopped by Lucas, but all his save did was push the ball back to Bell, who didn’t miss twice.
The pivotal moment:
Right after the second half kicked off, a stray high foot earnt Tim’s Boys a free kick close enough to the goal. They almost managed to make it work with their attacking move drawing CMP’s keeper out of position, but the shot went wide. Had they scored the second half would have seen an immediate momentum shift, maybe giving Tim’s Boys enough hope and inspiration to salvage something.
The stars: CMP - Tom Kirkland. Four goals, with one being a long range beauty? This was Kirkland’s game from start to finish.
Tim’s Boys - Nicholas Masters. A tough game all around for Tim’s Boys, but Masters at least managed to prevent perfection for CMP by ending their clean sheet.
The comment: Max Petersen, CMP attacker: Last week we got played off the pitch because we didn’t stick to our positions but this week we improved and the result speaks for itself. I like to say you live and you learn, you fall down and you get back up, and well, we got back up.
The bad boys: Yellow cards: Gus Petersen (CMP)
Red cards: N/A
The meaning: For two teams slated to be title challengers, this is a crushing blow to Tim’s Boys particularly after winning their opening match against The Mandalorians. They’ll need to respond in the right fashion and fast, for this whalloping has sent them sliding to ninth. They can however take inspiration from CMP who had the perfect rebound from their defeat to Tang’s Tangtastic Ten and can now use this as a launch pad for the rest of their campaign. Three rounds in CMP sit fourth on the ladder.
The future: The whole league had labour day relaxing, but both sides will be back in action on Sunday the 1st of November. Tim’s Boys will be up against WCU at 10am whilst CMP take on league leaders Man Titty at 11:40am. As usual both games will be at Boyd Wilson. The rest:
The Mandalorians 1-5 Man Titty
Wellington Chin United (WCU) 5-3 IBU Vauxhalls
Tang’s Tangtastic Ten 4-0 The Casuals 2020
Inter Galatic FC 4-0 VUWAFC Unicycles